Arja Mäkinen: Vanhojapiikoja ja vapaita naisia

 

(free translation to English could be something like Old spinsters and free women)

This is the book made out of the authors Thesis Oikeesti aikuiset (Real adults). Basically it's the dummies version of the first one. Maybe if i hadn't read the thesis first i wouldn't feel like this, but this is how i view it now. 

It is a really good book describing the situation where you are alone and don't want any children.. And as a little lighter reading than the original thesis this could do the trick. But for me having to read the other one first, i kind of rely on that one more and this is.. just what it is: kind of repetive and doesn't really give anything new to the table.

Arja Mäkinen: Oikeesti aikuiset

Free translation of the title could be  Real adults. 

Little bit background: I've apparently started to reach that agepoint where most of my friends have already have children, are either pregrnant, dream of having children or are trying to have them. Some how i do kind of feel like left out. Not because i would want to be in their situation, 'cause honestly i don't even want to. But to be that only person who doesn't dream about the same dreams and doesn't really want to live life like that - it's sometimes quite hard in a society where living life without children is kind of a thing where you get judged on easily. 

The book is a thesis of women who live alone and don't have any children/ don't want any children or cannot have any children. There hasn't really been that much of studies on the subject and specially not within Finland, so i was really pleased i found this one (and actually couple others from the same writer). 

Of course when this is a thesis, it's not really any kind of self-help book, but anyways at least for me, it really helped out to see that there are really others like me. Others that kind of maybe would like to be in a relationship but it hasn't really ever happened - but are satisfied in their lives anyhow, but seem to get this judgement from the people and the whole society that gives out the norm that it's almost obligatory to get into a relationship, get married and have kids. 

It's really releaving that eventhough majority of the people don't understand this kind of way of living and probably assume it's either being some crazy manhunter or gay, there are other people out there who has to fight against these same assumptions and has to justify their way of living. In the perfect world you wouldn't have to justify it, but in rhe real world i don't see that happening in anytime soon..